If you are wondering what a runner thinks about when he/she runs here are a few of the things that usually go through my mind.
– Should we go to Shipley’s after? A chocolate doughnut does sound good.
– Is my ass chaffing? Oh my God I hope my ass isn’t chaffing!
– Why did that MoFo just pass me? Nobody passes me…Nobody!! Ok, I passed him/her, wait, you mean I have to run harder to stay ahead…why (whining.)
– Do I want steak for dinner, no wait, a big juicy burger! No wait, we’re going to Chipotle and I want a big burrito…no wait, I want a shake from steak and shake!! No wait, right now…right now I want a Powerade slush from Sonic!!
– Clouds where are you? Hide the evil sun!!!
– I should have worn my shirt. My stomach looks flabby today…Wow, who gets to be the girl.
– Ok what kind of bug just flew in my mouth?
– Put your back up straight when you pass these people…look alive man. Run like you have done it before.
– I wonder what song he/she is listening to on their ipod? Let’s get closer and see if I can find out. Dang it…I can barely hear it!!
– Oh look they’re having a picnic…Lucky Bastards!
– Should I say hi, smile, or wave to this person that is approaching. Nope, he/she didn’t look up…it’s cool…No really, I’m fine. Here comes another…oh he/she smiled…now that makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside.
– Oh my God a snake…Oh my God that’s a snake (trying not to scream out loud.)
– Was that dog poop? I hope that wasn’t dog poop!
– I have to pee! No I don’t. Yes I do! No I don’t! Darn it I have to pee!
– It’s hot, but at least I am getting a tan…Wait, I’m Mexican…I always have a tan. Well, then I’m just hot!
– Are they really going to make me have to hurdle that dog leash?
– Really!?! Are you really going to act so nonchalant about your human blockade?
– Is it just me or does it smell like something died out here? OMG! There is a dead raccoon in the grass!?! (Seriously! Legs up and everything)
– Oh look at that cute little kid on his/her tricycle…Now Move!!!
– Just keep swimming. Just keep swimming.
– That’s a huge dog! I wonder if the owner would mind if I rode it the rest of the way.
– In through your nose, out through your mouth. Screw it…I’m tired!
– How many miles did we say we’re running today? You’re killing me Smalls!
– Just be happy you’re running. There was a time you didn’t think you could do this…Now look at you. (Smiling)